Actual excuse notes from parents:
My son is under a doctor's care and should not take P.E. today. Please execute him.
Please excuse Lisa for being absent. She was sick and I had her shot.
Dear School: Please excuse John being absent on Jan. 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, and also 33.
Excuse Roland from P.E. for a few days. Yesterday he fell out of tree and misplaced his hip.
John has been absent because he had two teeth taken out of his face.
Megan could not come to school today because she has been bothered by very close veins.
Chris will not be in school because he has an acre in his side.
Please excuse Tommy for being absent yesterday. He had diarrhea and his boots leak.
Irving was absent yesterday because he missed his bust.
Please excuse Jimmy for being. It was his father's fault.
I kept Maggie home because she had to go Christmas shopping and I don't know what size she wears.
Please excuse Jennifer for missing school yesterday. We forgot to get the Sunday paper off the porch, and when we found it Monday, we thought it was Sunday.
My daughter was absent yesterday because she was tired. She spent a weekend with the Marines.
Please excuse Jason for being absent yesterday. He had a cold and could not breed well.
Please excuse Mary for being absent yesterday. She was in bed with gramps.
Please excuse Ray Friday from school. He has very loose vowels.
Maryann was absent December 11-16, because she had a fever, sore throat, headache, and upset stomach. Her sister was also sick, fever and sore throat, her brother had a low grade fever and ached all over. I wasn't the best either, sore throat and fever. There must be something going around.
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The Lighter Side (Apr 2015)
April 29, 2015
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