The Lighter Side (May 2021)

ACHOO!

It’s allergy season and while everything is blooming, human beings are reacting.  Itchy eyes, coughing and sneezing are no fun, but perhaps these allergy jokes will make you feel better this spring.

Q: What does an allergic person have in common with bees?
A: They both have hives.

Q: Did you hear about the convict who had allergies?
A: He broke out.

Q: What was the cause of the tech-guru’s most recent seafood reaction?
A: Her new shell-phone

Q: Why did the man with a wheat allergy eat bread?
A: He was a gluten for punishment.
 
I’m writing a screenplay about a group of criminals scheming to rob an allergy clinic.
-I’m thinking of calling it “The Gesundheist”.
 
"Hey bro, so I just got diagnosed with a dairy allergy."
"No whey, man."
 
My favorite summertime allergy song is Blowin’ in the Wind...
-By Peter Pollen Mary
 
Q: What kind of tool fixes allergies?
A: A Benadryl
 

Amazing languages: Unlikely words and phrases
              
Google defines the German word Kummerspeck as 'grief bacon.'  That is a literal translation, and it tells you that Germans are champions at sticking nouns together.  But beyond that, it describes emotional overeating, like when you break up with someone and then put on extra pounds.
              
Here are some other words that describe a world of living in other languages:
              
Japanese: Wabi-sabi: There is a whole Wikipedia page dedicated to this word.  It describes the appreciation of beauty by understanding that life and objects are fleeting, imperfect, even melancholy.  All of that in one bite.
              
Spanish: Me pica el bagre -- literally, the catfish is biting me.  Or, you are really, really hungry.
              
Italian: Pantofolaio -- literally, someone who wears slippers all the time.  In other words, lazy.
Ha ami da pesca in tasca -- literally, he has fish hooks in his pocket.  The meaning?  He's cheap.
                              
Arabic: (Transliteration) Sayim sayim wa tiftar eala basala  -- literally, fasting all day only to break your fast on an onion.  Meaning: Disappointing.  And you can see why.
              
Chinese: (Unaccented transliteration) Dai lu maozi -- literally, to wear a green hat.  Meaning: a man who gets cheated on by his wife.  Best advice: Never give a green hat for a present.
 
Finally, another German double noun: Treppenwitz -- literally, staircase joke.  Meaning: The witty rejoinder that you think of after the fact.